Dear Parents and teachers,
Your child will be appearing for his/her exams very soon. This means he/she is blessed to write exams. Think of the children who are begging for a living and have never seen a school.
So, be happy in the first place.
Your child, you and the teachers have put in all their effort throughout the year- Right? Hence, each one has to have confidence in others and self too.
But dear parents and teachers; Now is the time to give that little Positive Stroke, a pep talk and forget EXPECTATIONS.
Tell your child that exams are not the ONLY yardstick for success. Tell him/her to do the best. Never mind if she does not perform as per her expectations. Every day is not a full moon day…right?
This will put your child at ease. FEAR is one deadly devil in the student’s life, and this comes when Parents and Teachers have EXPECTATIONS.
Parents should manage the erratic mood swings of their children.
Let’s support our own children, neighbors children and students. If we can all be a little sensitive and understanding….. We can be of some emotional support to all exam going children.
We all can do our little bit.
1. As parents: Please wake them up in the morning as you have to do throughout the year. Avoid the words exam. Be normal. More than the child, the parents are emotional.
2. Allow the child to do the regular routine work in the morning. Do not overdo by giving special service to your child. Unknowingly you are stressing him. Give him his usual breakfast. Mothers take extra care by offering Walnuts, hot milk, almonds etc. C’mon!!. Do not scare your child…..
3.. Take care of the communication you have with your child before she leaves for her exams. It is NOT the time to advise. Check if she has taken her hall ticket, stationery (additional too). Avoid saying “I am sure you will Excel” What if she does not do well? …….and take some extreme step because you said I am sure you will Excel. Remember! Most suicides happen because a child fails to come up to EXPECTATIONS. Just wish her the best and that’s that!
At most…… tell her to read everything carefully before answering and answer whatever is possible in an ethical way.
4. Ask your child NOT to discuss anything with friends either the previous day or on the day of the exam or even just a few hours before the exam. Some friend can simply ask some difficult question at the last moment which may make your child nervous and forget what he/she has read. (The difficult question may not even appear in the question paper)
5..Immediately after the exam, just go home. DO NOT sit and discuss the paper. This can have a bad impact on the next paper. Parents should avoid assessing the paper to find out how much their child will score? This is not the right time. This can be done after completing all the exams… Right? Can you change whatever has happened? Be practical and support your child for the next exam.
6.. Please ensure that a very happy and healthy atmosphere is given to the child in the house during his exams. Spouse arguments, flaring of tempers at home can have a negative impact on the child.
7. If you have an atmosphere of TV sounds and music at home, Keep it that way. Do not change the ambiance of the house suddenly. I have seen parents whispering….. thinking that the child gets disturbed. In fact, your whispering disturbs the child? more than normal behavior.
8. Do not suddenly start burning Incense sticks etc. It can start allergic rhinitis. Your child will not be able to concentrate with a running nose and sneezing. Many parents take their child to the temple. Be careful of the Lobhan Smoke. I have seen children developing Asthma in the exam hall. Avoid deodorant etc. Avoid any new kinds of food/juices etc. Any new experiment may give an adverse reaction.
9. Avoid nagging for any reasons.
10. Allow the child to sleep when (he)she wants to sleep. Do not impose your timing.
12. Avoid constant advice during exam time. The kid will get pissed off. Give the child his/her space.
13. If your child feels comfortable to read on a sofa or a bed… So be it! Do not insist on how and where they should read. Is the Process important of the Objective?
14. Stand by your child even if the exam has not gone as per your or his expectations..It’s ok…
From today, don’t let the child meet the relatives and family friends or even parents of his/her friends. This is not a time for Mass advice by the public.
15. Do not discuss Career options at this point in time. This is the time to just Read, Revise and revise again.
Be normal, behave normal, keep calm, accept whatever happens, and Hope for the best.
You, your child and teachers have done their best. Leave something to GOD!
Lots of love to your child and best to you and the teachers
About the author: Dr. D G.Kulkarni is Head of the Department, Master of Business Administration KLE Dr. M S Sheshgiri college if Engineering and Technology. Can be reached at [email protected]